That was it. A three sentence email that brought my entire world down. I thought we would get married. I thought we'd spend the rest of our lives together, despite how difficult the one year deployment in Korea had been, despite the fact that we had already broken up before. I really thought he was it. That he was the one. That there would be no others after him, because there wouldn't be an "after him". I was wrong-I was so, so wrong...
You always hear of the soldiers who go overseas for a year, and their girls leave them, cheat on them, whatever. That is not what happened-I waited faithfully at home, wasted my life waiting on him, and he screwed me, BIG time.
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This is my story. I have been broken for too long. My hope is that putting it down, in words, will give me the power back that he took from me so long ago. I will do my best not to embellish or exaggerate the details, and have looked over the emails we sent while he was overseas to make sure I tell the story as accurate as possible.
I have been tortured for over a year, and I have felt more defeated than you ever thought possible. There's just something about him, and something about the spark between us, that has made it so hard to move on and be complete again. This is not to rub his name in the dirt, and I won't reveal his last name, and have changed the names of his family members. But this is about me, not about him. It's about healing, it's about change, it's about moving on.
This is my first attempt at writing. I am by no means a professional. I am a first grade teacher just trying to heal. The goal is to write an entire book, a full length book-or as my students would say, "a grown up chapter book!" And maybe, depending on how it goes, try to get it published. So please comment, ask, be constructive. Hopefully, if nothing else, all of this results in a slight bit of entertainment for readers, and maybe someone else shares my story.
